Category: Life

Life

Rain, floods and natural disasters

Raidah Shah Idil

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My husband and I have been watching the news and we were really shocked to see how a few days of heavy rain in Sydney meant flooding in Queensland, and in another news segment, there were really bad bush fires elsewhere in Australia! I pray that everyone in these affected areas stays safe, heeds the emergency warnings, and that relief for them comes soon.

We had our own brush with flooding a few days ago. My husband travels to different work sites as part of his job as an acoustics engineer. A few days ago, I followed him as he drove to the Hunter Valley to do some measurements – our plan was to stay overnight, and for him to continue working the following day at a nearby town. A phone call from one of his clients derailed our plans – a river in that town had burst its banks, and the roads were closed. So we ended up driving back after he completed his first job near the Hunter Valley.

This goes to show that work plans really take a back seat when natural disasters take centre stage :p The rain is continuing to pour in Sydney. Here’s hoping the floods will abate in Queensland, and that people will stay safe and resume their normal lives soon.

Islam, Life, Opinion, Writing

Being a Muslim Single Mum

Raidah Shah Idil

Muslim Mum

Check out my latest Daily Life Article: Being a Muslim Single Mum

Here’s hoping that my article will shed light on the everyday battles faced by single mums in general, and Muslim single mums, in particular. One of my close friends is a long-time convert to Islam, and she finds it really puzzling when Muslim families skirt uncomfortably around the topic of divorce, even if that’s their reality. It’s only as awkward as people make it out to be. Accepting the reality of divorce doesn’t make people more prone to it. Rather, I think that acceptance generates compassion and understanding, which is never a bad thing.

Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her), the wife of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), was a single mum! My seerah (Prophetic biography) teacher in Jordan taught us that in pre-Islamic Arabia, single mums were desirable because everyone knew they were fertile. Now that’s an interesting twist on single mums….

On another note, it’s a crying shame that the government has made drastic cuts to the welfare payments for single parents – single mums are the ones left with raising the kids and juggling jobs with less money coming in to help them. Isn’t the Labour government meant to help the most vulnerable segments of society?

 

 

Health, Life

Fruits that are berry good for you

Raidah Shah Idil

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Ha, forgive the pun, but I’ve come across this fantastic article: Eating Berries Linked To Lower Heart Disease Among Women.

I love strawberries and blueberries, so this is good news for me, and for all berry lovers out there. Food really is medicine, as traditional Chinese medicine says.

What we eat really matters! I feel better when I’m eating veggies, fruits, and when I exercise. Making healthy food choices impacts on my general well-being, and it starts at the grocery store. Here’s to more berries, and to a healthy life 🙂

On an exercise note, it’s awesome having the sun out again! Swimming in the ocean is a great way to keep fit and have fun. My husband bought me an Ahiida suit to wear when I’m at the beach. Admittedly, I feel like the odd one out when we first hit the beach, but by the time we’re in the water, I don’t care anymore lol. Balmoral beach is an amazing swimming beach because it doesn’t have those crazy waves that send you tumbling upside down. Check it out if you’re in the area!

 

Cycling, Life, Short story, young adult

Review of New Year’s Biking Adventure

Raidah Shah Idil

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I’m happy to report that Irfan and I had our first cycling adventure in the morning!

We left at about 9:30 am and there were barely any cars on the quieter roads. I’ve never cycled on the roads before, and I prefer easing my way into riding. Cycling on the quiet roads was a great confidence booster – and then I encountered my first uphill climb. OH MY QUADS.

That was a great way to figure out how to use the 6-speed Shimano gears.I was clicking frantically down to the lower gears when struggling uphill, and clicking back up to the higher gears when whizzing downhill. Am I glad my bike has great front and and back brakes. I actually flew off my seat when I jammed my front brake too hard. lol.

After the quiet roads, we rode down the cycle paths along the Pacific Highway and went up 2.2 km up to Artamon. We sat down in one of the parks in Artamon to cool off before we cycled back to Lane Cove. A  cyclist whizzed by, looked at my bike, then smiled at me. Hee! I guess she liked my bike. It’s so cool to now be part of a cycling community, and I’m looking forward to attending events like Try2Wheels 🙂 Free bike servicing, woo!

Overall, I’m really happy with the 5 km that I cycled today. There’s a freedom and independence to cycling that I’m really enjoying. I recommend it to anyone looking for a healthy workout, and an alternative way of travelling. Here’s hoping I’ll be able to cycle longer distances over time.

For the cycling enthusiasts out there, thanks for stopping by my blog 🙂 I’d love to hear from you.

On another note, I’ve realised the importance of stretching after (not before!) my bike ride. I made sure to do some stretches when I got home, to help loosen up the muscles of my legs, lower back and shoulders.

On a writing note, I’m working on designing my book cover with my publisher. Stay tuned!

 

 

Life

I bought a ladies vintage bike!

Raidah Shah Idil

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I bought this gorgeous mint bike from the Reid Cycles today! (Well, technically the baskets were sold out so I’m picking that up in Feb lol) I’m loving the comfortable bike seat and handles, and of course, the overall look of it. All I need is a summer dress, a straw hat, a few novels in my bike basket, and I’m set!

Irfan and I have been checking out different bike stores before I decided on my mint one. Aside from it being love at first sight, Reid Cycles has great customer service. In the other stores that we visited, none of the salespeople approached either of us. FAIL. The prices were pretty steep too, for that kind of non-existent customer service. In contrast, once I stepped into the store, the friendly salesperson came up to me to ask what kind of bike I was looking for. He made the interesting point that since I only intend to ride on smooth cycle paths and roads, there’s no need for me to have suspension. The 6-speed gears would really help me though.

I highly recommend Reid Cycles for anyone looking to buy a bike that suits you. You’ll get an awesome selection of bikes, fantastic service, and a great package of accessories when you do get a bike. Plus – 12 months of free bike servicing! How awesome is that?

Our New Year’s Day plan is to cycling in the morning around our green, leafy neighbourhood. Irfan is a more experienced cyclist, and I’m keen on following him around so I can learn where the cycle paths are in my neighbourhood, and beyond. I’m really looking forward to building up my riding stamina so I can cycle for longer distances. My goal is to build up my stamina to a point where I can cycle to Balmoral beach, then go for a swim to cool off!

Here’s to 2013 – a year of more exercise and greater well-being! What are some of your goals?

 

Life, Writing

I’m on holiday!

Raidah Shah Idil

1381969_tropical_island_holiday_2Since last Friday, I’ve been at Port Macquarie with my husband, in-laws and close family friends. The effect of sun, surf and general relaxation has been amazing for my writing productivity! I highly encourage a getaway if you’re facing writer’s block. I made the intention to finish up as much of my 9000 manuscript as possible (preferably, all 900o words!), and I’m really glad that I’ve passed the 6500 mark. I’ll worry about editing later. Now, I need to keep writing. I have today

I’m several shades darker and sunburnt after sitting at the beach. This morning was a highlight – my husband and I hopped on some bikes, cycled down to the beach, then dove into the water to cool off. Good fun! That’s the plus of being at a more deserted beach 🙂

I’m writing this from one of the Port Macquarie shopping centres, using my phone as a WiFi hotspot. The reception from our holiday house is poor, and we barely pick up signal at certain spots. That’s why you’ll find some of us congregating at, say, the dining table, catching up on Whatsapp conversations lol. We have to cross the ferry (it costs $3.10, one-way) to get to the city centre. Getting here was the first time I actually boarded  a ferry, while still being on a car. You can’t even tell the ferry is moving, then voila, you’ve reached the other side. Very cool.

2012 has been a busy year for me and I’m really glad I’m on a holiday to wind down, and reassess what I’d like to achieve when 2013 rolls around.

Have a great holiday!

Life

Walmart pulls the gun used in Sandy Hook massacre

Raidah Shah Idil

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When I read the Huffington post article Walmart Pulls Bushmaster Rifle From Website In Wake Of Newtown Shooting – I couldn’t believe it. You mean you can order guns from the Walmart website? Doesn’t take a genius to work out how that could contribute to the sorry state of shootings in America. But wait – guns don’t kill people, people kill people. *facepalm*

The bulk of my online shopping goes towards buying books. I guess other people buy guns. Good grief. The tragedy at Sandy Hook has had other ramifications – namely, a spike in gun sales. There’s an entire culture of fear-mongering that’s rife in America, especially when it comes to limiting gun sales.

After high-profile shootings, debate over gun control can cause consumer demand for guns to rise, government records have shown. Industry experts say fears that stricter laws will follow such incidents push people to stock up on firearms before regulators can clamp down. But last weekend’s spike in business was unprecedented, gun shop owners in California, Connecticut and North Carolina told HuffPost.

Speaking of gun sales, here’s the long-awaited Important Statement from the National Rifle Association (NRA):

The National Rifle Association of America is made up of four million moms and dads, sons and daughters – and we were shocked, saddened and heartbroken by the news of the horrific and senseless murders in Newtown.

Out of respect for the families, and as a matter of common decency, we have given time for mourning, prayer and a full investigation of the facts before commenting.

The NRA is prepared to offer meaningful contributions to help make sure this never happens again.

The NRA is planning to hold a major news conference in the Washington, DC area on Friday, December 21.

Details will be released to the media at the appropriate time.

What is meant by ‘meaningful contribution’ remains a mystery. The press conference will get a lot of air-time, but it’s just another smokescreen. There’ll be another shooting, and it’s only a matter of time before that happens.

In other news, an asteroid Toutatis had  a close shave with Earth! For all of the drama that humans generate on this planet, it really doesn’t take much to wipe us all out. Namely, an asteroid hitting earth. According to the article, we’ll be okay for the next 400 years. From this particular asteroid, at least. When it comes to being safe from guns, on the other hand….

Toutatis would cause catastrophic damage if it ever did slam into Earth, potentially extinguishing humanity and many other species. In general, scientists think a strike by anything at least 0.6 miles (1 km) wide could have global consequences, most likely by altering the world’s climate for many years to come.

For comparison, the asteroid thought to have wiped out the dinosaurs 65 million years ago was an estimated 6 miles (10 km) across.

 

Life

“I am Adam Lanza’s Mother”

Raidah Shah Idil

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I read this powerful article by Liza Long, titled I am Adam Lanza’s mother. With a title like that, I just had to read it. Please, read it it too.

Lisa writes about what it’s like being a mother to a 13 year old son who is prone to acts of violence. She writes with raw honesty, and it hurts to imagine how difficult it must be for her and others in her situation. Dealing with threats of violence is a heavy burden, especially when it’s your own flesh and blood.

I am sharing this story because I am Adam Lanza’s mother. I am Dylan Klebold’s and Eric Harris’s mother. I am James Holmes’s mother. I am Jared Loughner’s mother. I am Seung-Hui Cho’s mother. And these boys—and their mothers—need help. In the wake of another horrific national tragedy, it’s easy to talk about guns. But it’s time to talk about mental illness.

And she’s absolutely right. Yes, talking (and actually doing something) about gun control is absolutely critical….but it’s not enough. Why is this pattern of American shooting rampages continuing to repeat itself? What’s driving these gunmen? I’m pretty sure the easy access to guns exacerbates the situation, but I’m yet to hear an honest conversation in the media about what’s driving these gunmen to kill so many people, including themselves. The worst part of this is unfortunately, it’s only going to be a matter of time until the next shooting happens.

School shootings and psychiatric drugs offers a different perspective. Keep an open mind…you’ll be surprised what you might learn.

Life

American Shooting Tragedy

Raidah Shah Idil

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Words fall flat in the face of the shooting tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut.

Most of the victims were just kids. Kids! Who had they ever harmed? Nobody! I don’t know what it’s like to be a parent, so I can’t even begin to comprehend the loss and devastation they’re going through. Nothing can bring these kids or their teachers back. In the face of such reckless disregard for life, I commend the heartbreaking bravery of the teachers who stepped in between the gunman and the children. They gave up their lives to protect these children.

It’s disturbing to see that Nancy Lanza, the gunman’s mother and his first victim, was a gun enthusiast herself. The guns he used to murder so many people were hers. Legally bought. None of us will know what went through the mind of the Adam Lanza, and what kind of rage could motivate him to kill his own mother, and so many others. As this NY times piece pointed out – all the seven adults who were killed were women, and the bullets used by the gunman were designed to inflict maximum harm. Devastating. All life is precious, and it’s appalling that this kind of shooting rampage is not a one-off event in America.

I’m not American. I have no understanding of this ‘right to bear arms’. As Huffington Post tweeted recently, what about the right for children to live? If you ask me, the choice is clear. If the gun situation in America has escalated to the point where children need to be trained for school shootings, then that’s an awful, awful place to be in. I wouldn’t want to be a parent in America, holding my breath each time I send my kid to school. Homeschooling takes on a whole new meaning for American kids. It could mean the difference between surviving to reach adulthood, or dying in another school shooting.

Sure, like a lot of other kids, I didn’t like school very much. But it never, ever crossed my mind that somebody would break into my school and rain bullets on my friends and my teachers. This is the fear of every American parent right now, in the wake of the  most recent school shootings. For Australian schools at least, the risk of a gunman is very, very low on our radar. And I pray that it continues to stay this way. Does it mean things were always peachy? Not at all. This SMH article points out what the Howard government did for gun control, after the 1996 Port Arthur massacre:

However, the federal Labor MP Andrew Leigh believes Howard’s success will endure. Leigh, as an academic, published research in 2010 that found the buyback of 500,000 semi-automatic rifles and shotguns had cut firearm suicides by 74 per cent, saving 200 lives a year. Gun homicides were down 59 per cent.

President Obama, what will you do now? Teary speeches don’t cut it. Gun control will.

Islam, Life

On interfaith dialogue and looking racially ambiguous

Raidah Shah Idil

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I just came back from a great gathering of 15 or so young Christian women. They wanted to hear what it’s like to be a Muslim women, so I gave them a brief rundown on my life, and left time for questions at the end.

The kinds of questions they asked me were interesting. One of the first questions was about arranged marriages. I made a joke while I was telling my story that yes, my marriage was arranged – I arranged it. lol. But back to the young woman’s question – I said it all depends on the individual. Some people get introduced to their spouses through friends, others through family members, while others randomly meet them at uni, volunteer events, or  – true story – the bus. The most important point is that the bride must give consent, otherwise the marriage contract isn’t valid.

It was a lovely gathering, and they gave me pretty flowers 🙂 This made me happy.

On another note, I read this article on looking racially ambigous by Chris, on the Peril blog. It made me laugh. A must-read! Here’s quote:

 

Some guy at uni: “Chris? Is he that black guy?”

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Some high school kid I was teaching: “Are you a wog, sir?”

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The neighbourhood bully when I was a kid: “Watch yourself, black boy.”

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Some stupid kid when I walked into the milk bar as a kid: “Hey look Mum, it’s a Ching-Chong.”

 

The most common comment that I get for people who can’t spot that I’m (mostly) Malay is, “But you look Chinese!”

Recently, I was on the train, iPod headphones in, listening to Tamora Pierce’s Wolfspeaker. An youngish Asian man boards the carriage and sits right across from me. I look up, we make eye contact, he smiles, then the Awkward Racial Conversation begins:

“Where are you from?”

“Um. I was born in Singapore.”

“What’s your race?”

“I’m mixed. Mostly Malay, some Chinese and Indian.”

“You have more of a Chinese look.”

“Uh. Yeah. Okay.”

“I think you’re very pretty.”

“Uh. Thank you.”

At this stage, he gets off the train, smiling away. I don’t know if I’m meant to be offended or flattered, so I return to listening to my audiobook. It’s like my interesting combination of looking Chinese and wearing a hijab/headscarf gave him the green light to suddenly ask me all these random personal questions!

This reminds me of an incident at least ten years ago when a woman on the train (again, sitting right across from me) starts talking very loudly to her daughter about how it’s such a shame that Muslim women cover their hair. Sigh. Seriously, wearing a hijab doesn’t make me deaf. I ended up talking to her directly instead of just passively sitting there, and by the end of our conversation, she was a lot nicer. Yes, it’s all very voluntary, and I’m happy to have a conversation about it if you ask nicely.