Category: Life

baby, Birth, Life, Love, motherhood

It’s a girl!

Raidah Shah Idil

Screen-Shot-2016-03-30-at-9.08.49-PM

Alhamdulilah, I gave birth to my second baby girl, Husna Aminah Binti Mohamed Irfan at 12:56 am, Friday, 12th January 2018. She was 40 weeks and 10 days, a solid 3.53 kg, and 52 cm long ❤

For any mamas looking for a gentle birth-supportive hospital, I highly recommend Dr Bheena and her Columbia Asia PJ team of nurses and midwives. Dr Bheena was hands-off and supportive enough to respect my birth plan, trust my birthing instincts, leaving me and my amazing Pak Bidan/birth coach husband, Irfan, to birth my baby.

I really recommend Hafsa Hasan’s wonderful holistic care for any fear release exercises and homeopathic support. After weeks of having my baby’s head being engaged and in position, all it took was one session with Hafsa on Tuesday, and I gave birth to Husna early on Friday morning. Woo! She does Skype consultations for anyone outside KL.

Husna is almost one month old, and I’m trying to nap when I can during the day. I’m so grateful for the support of my mum and mum-in-law – they help keep my 2.5 year old daughter entertained so I can rest.

It’s still early days in this precious and exhausting fourth trimester, and after putting my feet up, getting my painful and healing postnatal massages, heat pack treatment, herbal washes, belly-binding etc I’m starting to feel a lot better.

Which brings me to my next point – HOW DOES ANYONE RECOVER WITHOUT CONFINEMENT CARE???? IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?

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My next question – HOW DOES ANYONE HAVE MORE THAN TWO CHILDREN??

Elmo

Sigh. Work in progress, work in progress. Learning to juggle life with a newborn and a toddler is truly a laboratory of patience-making. I guess the difference this time is that I know the painful stages will end…only to be replaced by something else lolol.  And then my toddler and newborn smile at me and I’m mush again. Haha. I live for them squishy smiles. Ahh smelling my newborn’s head makes all that sleep deprivation worth it.

If you’re pregnant, want to be pregnant, or just are curious about all things related to babies and birth, check out some of my favourite resources:

101 Tips For Having A Natural Childbirth

Spinning Babies

Gentle Beginnings Doula Services

 

Life, motherhood, Writing

February 2017

Raidah Shah Idil

….already? RIS is around the corner! My todder is almost 20 months. SubhanAllah. Time flies.

I love these reads:

  1. Surviving as an Introverted Mother
  2. 5 Strategies to Help Introvert Parents Maintain Their Sanit

One really amazing piece of advice by Anse Tamara Gray: recharge during the hour before Fajr, and the hour after. Now that is a goal worth aspiring to! That’s only really possible if I sleep early.

Pre-baby: Ah, how I love the long, uninterrupted hours of night! I can write lyrical prose and poetry and [insert whatever else that used to happen]

Post-baby: Must. Sleep. Zzzzz

Note: I work for the SeekersHub Question and Answer service. If you have a question for me, please direct it through this form, and not through my personal email or Facebook. All questions are kept strictly confidential, and are left anonymous when we post it up. Thank you!

Islam, Life, Parenting

Ramadan!

Raidah Shah Idil

SubhanAllah, time really flies. Ramadan is literally just around the corner! May Allah grant us all the ability to honour this blessed guest, and help us restore ourselves through the winds of mercy.

Last Ramadan, I gave birth, alhamdulilah. This time around, I’m nursing an active 11 month old baby. The minimum requirement for me is to give an honest attempt at fasting. I’d love tips from experienced mothers 🙂

Here are some useful links from the SeekersHub Global answer service in regards to nursing/pregnancy and Ramadan:

Fasting Ramadan: Pregnancy, Breastfeeding & You

My Friend’s Baby Breastfeeds Throughout the Day. Is She Exempt From Fasting?

Pregnant Women & Fasting

Pregnancy & Making Up Fasts: Does She Really Have To?

May Allah bless the team behind SeekersHub global, who all work so hard!

*On that note, if you have any Shafi’i fiqh/general counsel questions you’d like me to answer, please post it directly on the SeekersHub answer service, and not through my Facebook account, blog or twitter. These are my personal accounts, and what I blog/tweet is not endorsed by SeekersHub Global. Thank you and may Allah reward you!

 

 

Fantasy, Life, Sci-Fi, Uncategorized, Writing

Muslims in Science Fiction? Yes! @Islamscifi

Raidah Shah Idil

I grew up on Star Wars, Star Trek, read Lord of The Rings and The Hobbit….science fiction and fantasy were my favourite escape pods. I loved these genres as a child, and I still do. But did I ever come across sci-fi/fantasy characters who were Muslim too? Nope. Not until Alif The Unseen, by the brilliant G. Willow Wilson. She’s also the writer behind Kamala Khan, a Pakistani American Marvel comic superhero. Ah, representation matters.

Muslims in science fiction. It’s a growing thing. Click here for the super exciting ISLAMICATE SCIENCE FICTION SHORT STORY COMPETITION! Spread the word!

 

 

baby, Life, Teaching

Back to work!

Raidah Shah Idil

Alhamdulilah, today was Day #1 of going back to the office for me. Hello Axiom Learning! It’s so good to be back. I’ve missed being in the office. Family-friendly offices are the best for working mamas. (Supportive managers and colleagues? Check. Private space to express milk? Check. Fridge to store milk? Check. Overall family-friendly vibe? CHECK!)

Of course, kudos goes to my amazing babysitting team ❤ It takes a village to raise a baby. Truly.

Although I’ve been working as an online counsellor for SeekersHub Global (another amazing team of people to work with!) since Taskeen was a few months old….it sure is nice to physically leave my home and interact with adults and children. AH, I LOVE BEING OUTSIDE. I also love being able to miss my baby. Nyaw.

Now. How to juggle everything. Duas, please!

baby, Life, Love, Parenting

What? It’s already April?

Raidah Shah Idil

So yes, hello again! Alhamdulilah, we’ve survived Taskeen’s 9 month sleep regression, which started at 7 months. Apparently there’s a 12 month one too. *cry* And she has teeth now! So many more to go. Oh, this first year of parenthood is something else. But one look at her toothy smile and OH THE PAIN IS GONE. All the pain. #mumnesia

Malaysia is in the midst of a heatwave. Yes, this already hot climate is even hotter. Keep hydrated, mummies and bubs. Daddies too, so you can keep helping. Survive one day at a time.

Here’s a great article on postnatal depletion by Pinky McKay. If you or someone you love is looking after a baby, please read it and share. If you’re looking for a great naturopath, I recommend Julide Turker. She’s based in Melbourne, Australia. Her ethical, compassionate and empowering diet/lifestyle tips and supplements have made a world of a difference in my journey through recovering from birth and surviving motherhood.

 

baby, Life

The Breastfeeding Diaries

Raidah Shah Idil
Image source: http://www.beautifulbreastfeeding.com/why-is-my-baby-feeding-again-75-reasons-your-baby-needs-to-breastfeed-besides-hunger/
Image source: http://www.beautifulbreastfeeding.com/why-is-my-baby-feeding-again-75-reasons-your-baby-needs-to-breastfeed-besides-hunger/

I absolutely loved this read “Why is my baby breastfeeding AGAIN? 75 reasons your baby needs to feed (besides hunger)” This was such a sweet, funny and encouraging read for all mummies who are breastfeeding their bubs.

My personal favourites, from the list:

5) It’s night and I can’t see you, so I need to touch and smell and taste you.

69) Morning snuggles are the best!

Nyaw! Both points help with the chronic sleep deprivation that comes with having a newborn. If anyone reading this has any pointers on gentle sleep training, please share! I’ve heard wonderful things about Tresilian, but alas, I’m living in KL and don’t have access to their sleep residency (?) program. They offer online chats though, from 5-11 pm Sydney time! So cool.

I still remember the haze of those early newborn days and weeks. Myer ‘organic’ maternity camisoles are the best. Thanks, Khad ❤ Having a lot of milk-boosting oats (yum) and fenugreek tea (not so yum) really helped me establish a good milk supply, alongside feeding on demand. A little discomfort is normal at first, but breastfeeding isn’t meant to hurt. Get the help of a lactation consultant if you need to – I know I was texting my mummy friends and the wonderful Nadine Ghows (“Is this NORMAL? She’s feeding every 2 hours!!”).

It’s so different breastfeeding my baby girl now she’s 4 months! She’s a champion roller and super distractible. Our nursing conversations sound something like this:

“Taskeen, that’s just the dogs outside. Oh that’s thunder. Don’t worry, you’re safe with mummy. Wow, yes, that’s the sound of the rain! It’s OK. Just drink. Haha. Such a cute smile you’re giving mummy!* OK go back to drinking. Please drink sayang, or you’ll get hungry soon. Haha. Still smiling at me. Funny baby.”

* I sound like Yoda lol

Life

One day left!

Raidah Shah Idil

Please click here to support the family of Salahudin Abdul-Razacq. He is survived by his wife, Ustadha Zaynab Ansari, and their three children. There’s one day left, and the target has almost been reached!

I will always be indebted to Ustadha Zaynab. She answered my emails during my tumultous twenties, and I still remember her compassion and sincere concern. Her wisdom, tact and intelligence played a huge role in my decision to study ‘ilm in Jordan. She made the time to speak to me on Skype before I travelled to Jordan, and I still recall her advising me to get my notes in order before I had children. At that point in my life, I felt so lost and I could not fathom being in a healthy and happy marriage, let alone have any children.

SubhanAllah, almost five years has passed from those difficult days. Allah has blessed me with a loving husband and a beautiful baby daughter. Alongside these blessings, Allah has given me the means to teach the introductory level of personally obligatory knowledge of Shafi’i fiqh, including the fiqh of menstruation. Allah Kareem.

Ustadha Zaynab, may Allah reward you for showing me so much kindness when I needed it most, and believing in me long before I could believe in myself. The world desperately needs many more lady scholars such as yourself. May Allah ease your heartache and that of your family, and reward you abundantly in both worlds.

Birth, Health, Life

Pilates, pregnancy and postnatal recovery

Raidah Shah Idil
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Source image: http://www.zenithpilates.com

Looking for a fantastic Pilates studio in the Mont Kiara area? Please drop by Zenith Pilates ! I’ve been attending postnatal classes with Dehressa, who is my instructor, buddy and comedienne, rolled into one.  She’s the kind of instructor who can make you laugh while engaging muscles you didn’t even know existed.

Dehressa has walked me through private and group Pilates classes during my pregnancy, and now is helping me reconnect with my post-birthing body.The difference between pregnancy Pilates and postnatal is remarkable…it’s so much harder now lol. Maybe because I’m constantly sleep deprived :p I nearly fell asleep during some of the stretches during one class, but after a few days of having chicken and mutton stew, I’m feeling much stronger.

I barely had any back pain during my pregnancy, alhamdulilah, and I owe a lot of that to my daily walking and weekly Pilates sessions. Sitting on a gym ball and doing regular pelvic tilts and figure 8’s also helped. The consequence of an open pelvis? An easy birth!

Sound good? Check out Zenith Pilates‘ FB page 🙂